Jar of Tears: Moms Aren’t Supposed to Die follows a young girl struggling with the death of her mom, who questions why God would allow her mom to die as she adapts to a whole new life without her. What was the inspiration for your story?

The inspiration for my story is my own story of grief and faith. My own mother died 8 days before Christmas, quite unexpectedly and I was thrown into a new family dynamic within hours of learning the awful news. In order to keep my new stepmother happy, I was discouraged from grieving openly, picking up on messages all around me that grief should be private and very short to prevent others from being uncomfortable. It wasn’t until 30 years later that I saw a therapist who told me my grief was not complete and it was time to go back to it. She assured me that grief will leave on its own timetable, not mine. I began facing the sadness that grief brought and it ended up bringing me peace and perspective. I wanted to share that wisdom with others since we live in a grief-illiterate society in North America.

Miracle’s story is relatable. There is no magic happy ending; instead, it portrays what life is really like after a loved one dies. What was your approach to writing the interactions between characters?

I believe that you cannot protect children from reality, but support them as they process it. I didn’t want kids to read that there is a happy ending, because that isn’t the truth. The truth is that there are little glimpses of happiness and life is very difficult, but there is value in the struggle.

There are so many dynamics within a nuclear family but it’s more complicated with a blended family, which is more often the case after the death of a parent. I wanted children to see that it’s hard for everyone to adapt to change at first, but there can be unexpected blessings, too.

What were some themes that were important for you to explore in this book?

I want, more than anything else, for children to know that while their heart is broken over the loss of a loved one, God is in control, He loves us, and He loves us so much that even something as insignificant as our tears are precious to Him. I want children to know that God has a place for our loved ones and us, that we get to enjoy forever if we put our trust in Him. Being honest with God about our anger, sadness, and loneliness is critical in our relationship with Him. It’s important we do not hide our emotions to protect others, but to be honest about them to our loved ones, and God.

What is one thing that you hope readers take away from Jar of Tears?

I hope readers will find value in the struggle to grieve and understand God’s Will. God can use anyone and anything to bring his children back to him. He can use unbelievers to be His hands and feet, loving on grieving children and providing a hopeful lantern to them while they journey in the dark valleys of grief.

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Original source: https://literarytitan.com/2024/07/14/peace-and-perspective/